


It's really quite poetic actually...

by Porkbunz_zz



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Connected Drabbles, Denial, Depressed Arthur, Depressed Merlin (Merlin), Hallucinations, Love-struck and oblivious idiots that they are!, M/M, Magic Revealed, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Short Story, Suicide, Temporary Character Death, poetic?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-19 08:27:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19971022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porkbunz_zz/pseuds/Porkbunz_zz
Summary: Can you hear that love? No?Shhh...Listen carefully now...You're swallowing my heart whole-I can hear death calling for me. You see, I'm dying with/out you...





	1. Act I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You've never looked more beautiful in the glowing moonlight dear. With your soft-serving skin and kissable lips. Eyes that shine a many blues and greens. Like the forest, like the sea. Huh, perhaps you should die more often. It's quite poetic when you think about it(Then again I really do hate poetry...)  
> hmmm....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for any awkward formatting. No matter what I do, it remains a little wonky...If you can bare, then may this story be worth its read...

A waterfall of red gushes down my arms, fingers paling in the sticky-syrupy-liquid ( _more.more.more!_ ). It pools around me like a chalky-sea of embers(fire in _your_ veins-it burns.it _burns.it_ **_burns-_** )I’m drowning in so much _blood(your blood.your blood_ ). where are you?! I don’t see you?!

_(hahahaha!)_

Your milky-white limbs drape over me like a second skin(perhaps because you’re _me_ ). There’s a hollow look on your face, like a screaming soul. hmmm...I don’t think I've ever seen you so vulnerable dear( _mine.mine.mine!)_

Can’t help running my hands through the smoky-matted hair(such a pretty raven, wouldn’t you agree darling?). Clumps of black and crimson. You’re quite a painting, you know(hang him.hang him).

Tracing the curve of your veins-every part of you is a constellation in the sky{ _hold me.hold me._ } Huh. You were always so beautiful-why did it take me this long to notice?

It’s so dark in here.

Where’s your soul love?!

Where did you go?!

Where did you go?!

Padding my thumb against your pretty lashes, I can taste the ivory-gold of your plush, pink-lips.{ _don’t let go. don’t let go!_ } Really, you are a _girl._

_(hahahaha!)_

Let me wrap your pearly-palms in mine(careful now-we don’t like breaking dolls!), kiss your sweaty-forehead. _ooo-ahhh-_ What a lovely feel of porcelain-even your eyes are a glossy-sea(keep him.keep him!).

Liquid-gold pours from inside you, splaying and mixing with the maroon.

_~Szzszssz ~szzszzssz_

You were killed by magic. 

( _hahahaha!_ )

And then I died too. 

  
hahahaahaha _hahah_ a _haaahahahaha_ hahaha _hahah_ a _haaa_ _hahaha_ ** _HahahHahaHAhaHAhaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_ **


	2. half-truths are sometimes better than a whole lie. Sometimes they're not. You decide this one-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Death is a half truth. Some people we keep alive...
> 
> "Join me darling! Let's dance with the devil tonight!"

The flowers are singing today love, searing their melody into my mind. They whisper of the promises between you and I, of our shared glances, secret adventures and lingering touches. I can’t help scarfing down some honey-cakes while sitting beside them in the grassy field. Sticky, gooey and sweet _sweet_ around my fingers. _tasty.mmm..._ The cook shouldn’t be too upset. I am the prince after all-who else is she baking for?

“Hahaha!” 

I can’t stop laughing. It’s the most beautiful sound I’ve made in a while, I’m sure of it! Just look at the way the wind scorches through the valley and the sun melts my crystal veins…

( _it burnsITBURNS_ **_ITBURNSBURNSBURNSBURNSBURNSSCALDINGHOT_** ** _BURNSBURNSBURNSBURNSBURNSSCALDINGHOTB-)_**

Clearly they must agree, no?!

Heh,

Better off in your grave dear _boy_ as your jokes could never make me this giddy(hush little baby-)Wait...something’s trickling down my cheeks. _drip.drop._ Salty and warm-it would seem I’m crying(-don’t say a word~). _Oh._

I didn’t know you could make me feel this way. 

_drip. drop._

I didn’t know you could make me so happy…

“Hahaha!”

where are you...

_{Have I gone mad?, he asks, unsure of being unsure._

_She walks, trips, falls_

_among the mad she goes_

_He already knows the answer, welcomes, embraces it_

_Yet he still asks_

_So she replies with a voice that’s much muchier than before._

_I’m afraid so, my dear._

_You’re EnTiRely BoNkErZ!}_


	3. there's no yesterdays without you darling-they simply don't exist. time to have some more tea...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Aaaaahhhhh!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Apologies to anyone getting constant notifications)
> 
> Highly recommend listening to either one while you read:  
> -Can't Help Falling in Love [ LIGHTxDARK REMIX ] feat brooke Produced by Tommee Profitt(copy and paste)  
> -Lovely by Billie Eilish

_"Isn't it lovely, all alone?_  
_Heart made of glass, my mind of stone_  
_tear me to pieces_  
_skin and bone_  
_hello,_  
_welcome..._  
_home..."_

_~Billie Eilish~_

* * *

My veins are made of glass dear. They burn harsh in the sun’s rays-hothot _hot-_ then shatter spontaneously from the blazing heat of the inferno-adskfjhaskdfh!!! 

I can feel it, the way _fire_ prickles my skin(hothot _hot_ ). There’s a storm brewing inside. You see, each shattered mirror is another piece of my soul disappearing(not really though-it all went away when you did, but it’s easier to dream-shhh)-and really, I don’t think there’s any left in the building, maybe some tea-cups( _slrrrrp-oo-ahhh!_ ). 

They don’t seem to carry dark silhouettes with them the way other reflections do. So tall and lanky with cheshire grins(and beautifulbeautiful beauti-). Sometimes I hear them cackle, whisper secrets--fairytales of pretty girls that turn into beasts, fallen goddesses with hearts of gold and a once and future king with magic in his veins--things I don’t understand(but somehow, I know they’re true, like I’ve seen them blindfolded.)

_(hush my little dragon-)_

I’m _not_ blind(though I wish I was), I can see the fear in their doe-eyes when the servants come rushing in with brooms- _sweep, sweep-_ and lowered backs and glances. The hushed whispers when they think I'm not there( _God since when did the castle’s corridors become place for so much gossip?!)_

They don’t have to say it darling, I already know. 

_Sweep~sweep._

They think I’m crazy. A mad king-their king ?!

_(keep suckling your claw)_

_._

_._

eh

.

.

I suppose without you, I am. Perhaps just a little

_._

_._

_(with closed eyes)_

.

.

Not my fault, however. My reality is simply different from theirs. 

_(I’ll keep you warm in the cradle)_

_‘-always by your side protecting you.’_

-Because here’s the thing love; Yesterday-you were saving my life while I took yours without trying(there was something unspoken in your look-something that made me tear my skin till I bled all over( _your blood. Your blood._ )). Today, though, you’re _just_ dead. So are your eyes.

_(keep singing my silly song)_

They think I can go back to a yesterday without you-like you didn’t exist. You weren’t any noble after all, you weren’t my _queen_.

“Hahahaha!”

Fools! If only they could understand-their beloved ruler was never-could never-why, I’m not _me_ without you. 

( _your milky-white limbs drape over me like a second skin-)_

Ba-dumm-tss! Ba-dumm-tss!

So therefore, there’s no use going back to yesterday, I was a different person then(no yesterdays without you, no yesterdays without you-).

But I’ll tell you a secret love-

_(laa-la-laaa...)_

We’re all mad here~they just don’t realize it. Not yet.

“Aaaaaahhhhhh!!!”


End file.
